Obituary of Melinda K. Gordon, M.D.

Melinda K. Gordon, M.D., 36, formerly of Iowa City, and beloved wife of Stephan Meyer, also formerly of Iowa City, died of breast cancer on October 24, 2007, at her home in Chicago, IL. Memorial services were held Sunday, October 28, 2007, at the Church of Our Savior in Chicago. In lieu of flowers, donations would be appreciated to the American Cancer Society at 225 N. Michigan Avenue, Chicago, IL 60601 or to MERCYCORPS, Dept. W. P.O. Box 2669, Portland, OR 97208, or to the Melinda Gordon Memorial Fund (checks payable to University of Chicago), University of Chicago, Office of Medical Center Development: Attn: Stephanie Dahl, 1170 E. 58th. Chicago, IL 60637. Melinda K. Gordon was born October 4, 1971, in Oak Ridge, TN. She was the daughter of Dr. Dale DeHamer and the Reverend Nancy Gordon. She attended grade school in Iowa City, then middle school and high school in Salem, OR. Returning to Iowa City, she graduated with honors in 1993 from the University of Iowa, and then she received her M.D. with honors from the University of Chicago in 1998. Melinda completed an Internal Medical residency at the University of California San Francisco, followed by a Clinical Medical Ethics Fellowship at the University of Chicago. She then was a Hematology/Oncology Fellow at the University of Chicago from 2002-2007. Throughout her life she received numerous honors and recognitions. She was united in marriage to Stephan Meyer on September 5, 2004, at the Church of Our Savior in Chicago. She was diagnosed with breast cancer in July of 2005, and with metastatic breast cancer in May of 2007. After her initial diagnosis she participated in two clinical research trials because she knew the information gathered from those trials was important to addressing the many unanswered question about cancer. As an oncologist her own research focused on doctor-patient communication concerning diagnoses and prognoses in cancer patients. Melinda rebelled against the notion that cancer is a “blessing in disguise” or ought to improve the patient’s character, for as an oncologist she was well aware that cancer often kills. She rejected “battle” metaphors for cancer, as she felt that it devalued the expense of those who died of cancer by making them into the losers. Cancer to her was instead a thief, stealing the lives and dreams of those if afflicts. She was also adamant that she be able to speak the truth about her experience of cancer rather than play the happy patient. From the fall of 2005 until just days before her death she was an active contributor to the youngsurvival.org message board for young woman afflicted with cancer. The comments posted before and after her death speak to the value of her presence to the other women on the board. One said. “I think we all immediately moved towards her post because we knew the tone: always kind, informative, loving, with humor thrown in for good measure. We will truly miss her.” Another said, “I remember posting about a letter someone left me that said “chemo makes tumor spread in MICE,” Melinda replied, “YOU AREN’T A MOUSE.” I read her comment, laughed, turned off my computer and had a great day.” Melinda’s family includes her husband, Stephan Meyer of Chicago; mother, Reverend Nancy Gordon of Chicago, IL; sister, Mary Beth DeHamer of Berkeley, CA, her loving grandmothers, Dorothy Gordon of Salem, OR, and Aileen DeHamer of Cedars, IA; parents-in-law, Dr. Paul and Peggy Meyer of Iowa City; brother and sister-in-law. David and Renee Meyer of Bellingham, WA; aunts, uncles and many cousins. She was preceded in death by her father, Dr. Dale DeHamer, grandfathers, James Gordon and Dwight DeHamer, and her uncle, Jim Gordon. Online condolences may be sent for Melinda’s family through the web @ gayandciha.com.